Marvel worlds
by Clownwithachainsaw
Summary: A series of one-shots in response to challenges. Genres may varie.
1. Rock 'N Roll dudes!

**Challenge: **

**Rock 'n Roll, Dudes!: **Write a fic about the Hulk and the Thing in a band together with some villains.

-Can include other Marvel characters.

-Must have at least one song written by the Hulk. (lol, I really want to see this one)

**The first three song are all mine (I'm sorry if they're not very good, I don't write songs very often). They are entitled; _Strange road, things always get worse, and Ruling the World._ The one sung by Thing & Hulk at the end, however, is entitled _Get Off Of My Back_ from the movie _Spirit_, and Deadpool's song is _Everything You Know Is Wrong_ by _'Weird Al' Yankovic._ The little snippet of a song the Deadpool Corpse sang before their last song is from a funny car commercial I saw once. If anybody knows the name of the song, please tell me.**

* * *

In a parallel world where the greatest musician rules, there is no place for second best. The musical industry is vicious, home to great heroes and great villains alike.

The sign hung like a herald of doom over the night club known only as; the Pantheon. The sign that would attract much unwanted attention, and send the regulars fleeing for their lives. The sign had five simple words; B.Y.O.B. Night.

Bring Your Own Bands.

The Pantheon; Hero's night club, founded by Tony Stark, was where heroes of music came to mingle. Spider-man, kid pop sensation became a hero at the age of fifteen, breaking several records. Captain America was the greatest singer in World War two, going so far as to serenade troops in battle with his melodies. Some say that the fall of Berlin was inspired by his music.

Currently on stage was a lone, somewhat skinny man in western styled clothes, strumming his guitar. He began to sing.

_Somewhere outside of civilized parts_

_There's a road I walk_

_And it's littered full of hearts a'broken…_

_I just keep walking until I stop,_

_I go as far as I can_

_Until I drop like a fly in Hoboken…_

_I try to fit in, like anybody wou__ld,_

_I drop my bags_

_And try to make good, 'fore the plot thickens… _

_But I just can't get a wink of rest,_

_Before the locals_

_Manage to stir up a nest of ten foot chickens…_

_Oh, I got troubles that nobody knows…_

_Life ain't fair and boy how it shows…_

_I've set my trail and I can't look back._

_I can only pray I'm on the right track._

_When they say it ain't easy being green,_

_They're right._

_My girl's back at her home with her dad,_

_And I'm not welcome _

_Back at her pad, until doomsday…_

_My shrink says I should move on with my life, _

_But I wish I could_

_Ask Betty to be my wife, if it were okay…_

_But instead I'm running down this lonely road,_

_With nowhere to turn to_

_When everything starts getting weird…  
_

_I've changed my clothes, and changed my name._

_I hitched a ride South_

_To get away from my dame, and grew a beard._

_Oh, I got troubles that nobody knows…_

_Life ain't fair and boy how it shows…_

_I've set my trail and I can't look back._

_I can only pray I'm on the right track._

_When they say it ain't easy being green,_

_They're right._

_For now I just want to be alone_

_But it feels like _

_I'm entering the Twilight Zone, on vacation…_

_Someday I'll put together my shattered life_

_And sew it up clean_

_As a surgeon's knife before an operation…_

_But for now, I'm in it over my head_

_I'm goi__ng to have to focus on surviving instead. _

_Because I got troubles that nobody knows…_

_Life ain't fair and boy how it shows…_

_I've set my trail and I can't look back._

_I can only pray I'm on the right track._

_When they say it ain't easy being green,_

_They're right._

_Boy are they right._

"Ha! Is that sappy western stuff the best you've got Bruce?" The spotlights swerved to the club's other stage. The Thing and his band, The Yancy Street Gang were had set up their instruments.

"No, but it should be enough to top whatever caterwauling is coming out of your instruments Thing."

"Yo' momma."

Bruce froze. "I'm sorry, what was that?"

The Yancy Street Gang's drummer stood up. "You heard me cowboy. Yo' momma's so fat, she became the titular character of her own comic book; Planet Hulk!"

"Woah hey, that's enough Hector." The Thing hoped not to get Banner angry. He didn't like him when he got angry. "Let's just show him how it's done."

The Nancy Street Gang began to play, Thing sang into a microphone with Alicia in the background.

_One day I'm sitting back, relaxing, playing on the beach._

_But then a shark tries to steal my swimsuit_

_While I'm splashin' in the water, shooting the breeze._

_One night I'm on the tube with my girlfriend, watching football_

_But then the Raiders have a real bad day;_

_The Jets catch the fumble and touchdown for the lead._

_But things get a lot worse before they get better._

_You have to tear the wrapping_

_To get granny's hand-knit sweater._

_You gotta take your lumps_

_If you want tea with the queen,_

_You gotta take one for the team._

_Come breakfast I'm sitting back, eating my McMuffin, when_

_Johnny comes in, says he ain't done nothing._

_And that's when I see the frog in my Orange Juice._

_Come the afternoon, there's been an alien invasion, and_

_I've been abducted for their alien games._

_And I just know that these're games that I'm gonna lose._

_But things get a lot worse before they get better._

_You have to tear the wrapping_

_To get granny's hand-knit sweater._

_You gotta take your lumps_

_If you want tea with the queen,_

_You gotta take one for the team._

_Now that shark is sushi in some Japanese place,_

_I went there with my girlfriend on a date_

_After the Raiders won the Superbowl twenty-one to seven._

_The frog took a swan-dive into Johnny's Captain Crunch._

_The Aliens got dealt with in a single punch._

_And my life ain't perfect but I'll give it a ten._

'_Cause things always get worse before they get better._

_I have to tear the wrapping_

_To get granny's hand-knit sweater._

_I gotta take my lumps_

_If I want tea with the queen,_

_I gotta take one for the team._

_I gotta take one for the team!_

"How do you like me now Banner?" Thing chuckled as the crowd cheered.

"Fools!" A voice called out. The crowd went silent. Dr. Doom had taken the other stage, with his band the fearsome four. His band included M.O.D.O.K. (Mechanical Organism Designed Only for Karaoke). His internal gyroscopes whirred as his mechanical body produced a pair of boomboxes. Sabertooth was at his side, strumming his electric guitar with his claws. Taskmaster was at the drums. All wore heavy metal make-up.

"You thought Doom would not notice it is bring your own bands night?!" Doom asked. "You thought Doom would not plan accordingly? Doom challenges the Yancy Street Gang and anybody foolish enough to take the stage to a battle of the bands!"

They began to play. A trio of Doombots sang in the background.

_There cannot be a snake without a head_

_At least that was what my dear mother said,_

_So while I grew I sharpened my fangs_

_And I waited for my day._

_Now that day has come, and I'm waiting ready,_

_My nerves are steel and my will is steady._

_I'll use all my might and all my brains_

_And soon the whole world will say;_

_Look out!_

_The Doctor's out of control!_

_He's quickly taking power_

_And he's still on a roll!_

_Look out everyone _

_Nothing can stop him now!_

_He's going to rule the world!_

_Alexander the Great was too good a sport,_

_Napoleon tried but he fell short,_

_Hitler was brutal but not too bright,_

_Ceaser should have watched his back._

_I know all of the tricks and all of the rules,_

_If you tried to stop me, you'd be fools!_

_Today is my day! Tonight's my night!_

_Better brace for my attack!_

_Look out!_

_The Doctor's out of control!_

_He's quickly taking power_

_And he's still on a roll!_

_Look out everyone _

_Nothing can stop him now!_

_He's going to rule the world!_

_You think you're the fighter who can stop me now?_

_The one who's better than I could allow?_

_Come on then let's go, I've taken on champs._

_I will have my victory!_

_I've managed to fight my way through to the top,_

_I'm gonna keep fighting and I won't stop._

_I've kicked my power level up some amps, _

_You pose little threat to me._

_Look out!_

_The Doctor's out of control!_

_He's quickly taking power_

_And he's still on a roll!_

_Look out everyone _

_Nothing can stop him now!_

_He's going to rule the world!_

_My middle name's trouble and my last name's doom,_

_My past's full of graves and I've still got room._

_The world will soon be under my thumb_

_An oyster to be de-pearled._

_I've put on my game-face, I've sharpened my blade._

_I've already won, so cease your crusade._

_Stop trying to beat me just succumb,_

_I'm going to rule the world!_

_Look out!_

_The Doctor's out of control!_

_He's quickly taking power_

_And he's still on a roll!_

_Look out everyone _

_Nothing can stop him now!_

_He's going to rule the world!_

_Look out!_

_The Doctor's out of control!_

_He's quickly taking power_

_And he's still on a roll!_

_Look out everyone _

_Nothing can stop him now!_

_He's going to rule the world!_

Doctor Doom raised his hands in triumph. "Doom wins!"

The crowd cheered and the Thing turned to his band. "Alright team we can beat that, we –"

He froze as he saw the Hulk grab his drummer by the head. "What was puny drummer-man saying about Hulk's momma?" He asked.

"Hulk, stop!" Thing yelled. "Put Hector down!"

Hulk shrugged and tossed Hector's body to one side.

"Awe fer the love of – now we son't have a drummer!" Thing yelled.

Hulk thought for a bit. "Hulk can smash." He said, thoughtfully.

Thing raised his eyebrows.

"Hulk can smash, gently."

"Aaargh, I suppose it'll have to do." Thing growled. "Let's blow these heavy-metal punks to oblivion.

"Hulk can write too." Hulk said, handing over a piece of sheet paper.

Thing took it. "Eh, better then what we had." Thing shrugged. "Or what you had for that matter."

"Puny Banner does Romantic westerns. My westerns got umph."

Thing shrugged. " All right Banner, let's do this. It's clobberin' time."

They began to play;

_Oh if you think that you can take me on_

_You must be crazy.  
There's not a __single__thing you've got  
That's gonna phase me.  
Oh, but if you want to have a go  
I just want to let you know…  
_

_Get off my back and off of my name.  
Get out of my way and out of my __brain__.__  
Get out of my face or give it your best shot.  
I think it's time you better face that fact  
And get off of my back._

_You know this isn't just some game_

_That you're playing.  
Don't think that you can figure me out  
Is all I'm saying.  
Oh, but if you want to have a go  
I just think that you should know..._

_Get off my back and stop playing your game.  
Get out of my way and out of my __brain__.__  
Get out of my face or give it your best shot.  
This train is going to come off of its track,  
So get off of my back.  
_

"Suits you." The Thing said, nodding to the Hulk.

Hulk clapped enthusiastically.

Spider-man Captain America and Tony Stark considered, and raised their cards. They gave the Yancy Street Gang a 10, 10, and 7.5 respectively. They gave the Fearsome Four a 4, 0, and 7.5.

"Curse you Thing!" Doom cried. "I will conquer the musical industry some day! And when that day comes... you shall feel the wrath of Doom!" The crowd booed them off the stage.

"Well, time to pack it in gang." Thing gestured to his band.

"Awww… but I wanted to throw down with Banner." Wolverine growled at them. "That's part whole shtick… we constantly fight with our music."

An injured Hector raised his head. "Yo momma…"

_Snikt_

"…is a wonderful person." Hector fainted.

"well, you can always throw down with them." Thing gestured to theband occupying the stage. It was Deadpool, and the Deadpool corpse. Accompanied by Bob agent of Hydra, some Chainsaw wielding clown, and Bea Arthur.

"No thanks." Wolverine grumbled, hefting his guitar and trudging towards the bar. The Deadpool corpse began to sing…

'_Cause we're maniacs, maniacs woah-oh-oh…_

_And you know that we're all going for the go-old!_

As the crowd cheered them on, the Thing and the Hulk took their opportunity and ran. Neither of them much cared for the musical styling's of Deadpool, despite his immense popularity.

_I was driving on the freeway in the fast lane  
With a rabid Wolverine in my underwear  
When suddenly a guy behind me in the back seat  
Popped right up and cupped his hands across my eyes_

_I guessed, "Is it Sabertooth or X-23?"  
"Is it Cable or Bea Arthur?"  
"Could it be Mom or Bob, Agent X or Deathstryke?"  
I probably would have kept on guessing  
But about that time we crashed into the jet_

_And as I'm laying bleeding there on the asphalt  
Finally I recognize the face of my hibachi dealer  
Who takes off his prosthetic lips and tells me;_

_"Everything you know is wrong  
Black is white, up is down and short is long  
And everything you thought was just so  
Important doesn't matter_

_Everything you know is wrong  
Just forget the words and sing along  
All you need to understand is  
Everything you know is wrong!"_

_(I shot him, the jerk.)_

_I was walkin' to the kitchen for some Golden Grahams  
When I accidentally stepped into an alternate dimension  
And soon I was abducted by some aliens from space  
Who kinda looked like Jamie Farr  
(bet they were Skrulls)_

_I shot some of their vital organs  
And they took some polaroids  
And said I was a darn good sport  
And as a way of saying thank you  
They offered to transport me back to  
Any point in history that I would care to go_

_And so I had them send me back to last Thursday night  
So I could pay my phone bill on time  
Just then my floating disembodied head of  
Colonel Sanders started yelling;_

_"Everything you know is wrong  
Black is white, up is down and short is long  
And everything you thought was just so  
Important doesn't matter_

_Everything you know is wrong  
Just forget the words and sing along  
All you need to understand is  
Everything you know is wrong!"_

_(So I shot it too. It exploded like a Kentucky fried pinyata.)_

_I was just about to mail a letter to my evil twin  
When I got a nasty papercut  
And, well, to make a long story short  
It got infected and I died_

_(I meant to do that!)_

_So now I'm up in heaven with St. Peter  
By the pearly gates  
And it's obvious he doesn't like  
The Nehru jacket that I'm wearing  
He tells me that they've got a dress code_

_Well, I shoot him and I go in anyway  
But I get the room next to the noisy ice machine  
For all eternity  
And every day he runs by screaming;_

_"Everything you know is wrong  
Black is white, up is down and short is long  
And everything you used to think was so important  
Doesn't really matter anymore  
Because the simple fact remains that_

_Everything you know is wrong  
Just forget the words and sing along  
All you need to understand is  
Everything you know is wrong!_

_Everything you know is wrong!"_

_(I blew him up. There were feathers everywhere.)_


	2. An Exile

**Challenge:**

**An Exile;** Write about one of the Exiles, one-shot about his/her life before he/she was unhinged from time. It can be a character from Exiles comic books, or your own creation.

- Don't use characters of Hulk/Sentry/Silver Surfer power level.

- Try to avoid cliches like "heroic Doc Octopus vs. evil Spider-Man".

**So, the background; I love Exiles. Seriously, who thought of the idea to take popular heroes, put a twist on them, and put these twisted alternates on a team travelling to parallel earths? Was it Deadpool? I bet it was Deadpool. Good one Deadpool.**

**Obviously, this allows me to put my own twists on Marvel characters, but I have refrained from doing so for three of my characters (Peter Parker, Kraven, and Thermite). Not so for my main character, which is a character from my Silver Wars.**

**What are the Silver Wars? I'll tell you. Remember in the DCU, that annoying whiny supervillain Superboy-Prime? Yeah, the snot nosed nigh-omnipotent crybaby who wants to make the perfect earth. Well guess what? He's a parody of all of us. Yes, all of us fans who think we know which direction things should go, then get annoyed when they don't. Of course, the worlds are going down in a death spiral anyway. So, before I realised this and came to my senses I created the Silver Wars. An enourmous graphic novel crossover that killed off all of the heroes who I considered unnessesary, boring, or I just didn't like them. This event took place after Civil War (where there are too many heroes to count) so it is now obsolete, due to things like the Skrull invasion, Dark Reign, and Mary-Jane's deal with the devil (I refuse to believe Spider-man would do such a thing).**

**The main villain is Tristran Silver. He's a gang boss who's ruled the whole world with hardly anybody knowing it for the better part of three-thousand years. He appears in a graphic novel called Identity Disc, where he supposedly brings together a new sinister six to retreive a disc with the secret identities of all the heroes on it, in possession of Hydra. Of course, the disc is in possession of SHIELd instead, and the Vulture was behind the whole thing. But in the ending, we see the supposedly dead Sandman drinking a soda on the beach, when a mysterious man in a trenchcoat walks up to him. He thanks Sandman for informing him that somebody was using his name, and assures Sandman that he will live the rest of his life in happiness for his loyalty. He casually remarks that stealing the real disc might be a worthwhile venture, and walks away leaving Sandman with a look on his face that suggests he was expecting to die just then. Silver is not seen since, which I think is a crying shame.**

**The Silver Wars opens with a sense of dread in the air. After Civil war, everybody expects something big to happen. Loki finds Peter Parker's daughter (Spider-man helped save Loki's daughter once, and Loki said that he owes him) and Dr. Strange is attacked and killed by Elektra, Sofia Mantega, Bulldozer, and Crossfire, all decked out in symbiotes. Nico Munroe takes his place as sorcerer supreme and his place on the Illuminati, who immediately dicuss the repercussions.**

**We then find out there is an evil Illuminati (much like what Norman Osborn had, except better) whose membership included The Kingpin (Still in jail, but still formidible), John Sublime (hiding in Mr. Fantastic's body), The Red Skull, Emma Frost, Azazel, and Silver himself. Thanks to Sublime they know the Illuminati's plans and they decide to wage all-out war.**

**No. Not a 'civil war'. War as in WWII. As in, dead bodies all over the place. That type of war. It lasts for three years.**

**So, yeah. That's basically all you need to know, other than what Blade will tell you, about my Silver War universe. Which will not come to be. The other characters in the Exile are; Peter Paker from the powerless universe (the universe that comes closest to reality, and nobody has any superpowers. Better than it sounds). Kraven the Hunter from earth 616 (He's better than he's been portrayed). Detective Scorpion, from the universe where the good guys are bad and the bad guys are good (cliche, maybe. But I just couldn't pass it up). Jaque Lebue, see his origins on the Make your own character Marvel forum. And Thermite from Squadron Supreme.**

**I'm sorry my main character is such a whiner.**

* * *

I am Nobody.

I am an Exile.

I have been hunted down by even my own father for the crimes I had to commit. I never had a choice in the matter, Silver saw to that. He knew all of our strengths, all of our weaknesses. How? I don't know. But we were played. Like a saxophone.

Do you know what annoys me the most? Some people say they saw it coming. They didn't see it coming. Maybe we felt something stirring on the horizon… maybe there was a hint here, a hint there, none of it making any sense. We all knew something was coming… but how could they know? How could they know that I'd betray my team… start the war…

It wasn't my fault.

All good things come to an end. They all decay, and wither, like Peter's right arm. Governments start with good intentions, and then fall, thanks to the pride and corruption in their midst. We knew that… that's why we did what we did alone, instead of joining the police, or the army, or even S.H.I.E.L.D. That's why we fought in the Civil War. Because every organization needs a reboot. Only the ideas last, everything else had to change.

Tony was too stubborn to see that. Tony thought we could learn. He thought we could fight the corruption, repel it, make rules for heroism. How do you make rules for heroism? Iron man never avoided restricted flight zones when going through them meant saving lives.

But he tried to make rules anyway. And when you make rules… your enemy can learn them. And Silver did.

I still see my team, falling.

I see myself inserting the bug into War Machine's armor, watch it fall off his body, then I stab him. Through the heart.

I see myself deftly slicing at Leonard Samson. He comes at me, fists swinging, not noticing my sword sweep above his hair. At his hair. His green locks fall to the ground. Only when he's practically bald does he realize what I was doing. He swings a fist. I catch it. He's weaker now. I execute him.

The Moon Night almost beats me. I wish he had. His sword just wasn't sharp enough. Strong enough. My own blade sliced through his like a piece of lamb. The moonlight glistened off his blood.

And then it was Cardiac. I let him blast away at me. I let him. Until he ran out of juice. And then I stalked him. Hunted him. I could smell his fear, just before I struck.

And then…

And then…

And then…

All of my teammates were gone. Except for the Prowler. Thank goodness, he'd done his homework. He knew how to bring me down. Silver stake. Right through the heart.

I don't know how I came back after that. I shouldn't have survived. I didn't want to survive. I came back after the war. Silver was dead. Even he couldn't account for the whole human race. But he didn't have to. Enough had died. Enough had died during the war that heroes everywhere, knelt down and wept into pools of their comrades blood.

I was already an exile then. I thank the Timebroker for exiling me permanently from my home. The home I destroyed. I had strengths, and some people forget that I even have weaknesses. But Silver didn't forget. He knew how to take control of me… how to make me do what he said without question. Even I didn't know…

My name isn't Blade any more. I've buried my blades. My name is Nobody.

I don't hunt vampires any more. There are no vampires left. I hunt for peace.

I travel with other exiles. Other heroes, not welcome in their own homes.

Peter Parker. Just a kid for crying out loud. One day, a radioactive spider bit his arm. It shriveled up and died. The kids at his school didn't even feel pity for him. They laughed, gave him swirlies, gave him wedgies, ran his underwear up the flag pole, waited for him outside the school locker room.

The kid didn't give up. I don't know if I'm impressed or sympathetic. He never gave up. He got a girlfriend, saved her life from some businessman after he kidnapped her when Parker refused to sell out on his company. Even then, he was still an exile. And now the id's here. With us. With the Tallus attached to his dead arm. Leading us, even though he knows he probably won't live to see tomorrow.

Kraven. Kraven the hunter. There was just one thing he was good at, and everybody hated him for it. Even his true love thought he wasn't good enough. She told him he had to take steroids to be the best. And in the end, after finding out the steroids were killing him, he finally stopped taking them, beat the one thing he had hunted for the past ten years without success, and shot himself in the head.

Mac Gargan. The Scorpion. In a world where everybody was content to lead happy lives, he dug deeper. He discovered the truth. He brought the truth to light, and started the war that consumed his planet. His world went from utopia to Armageddon in a night. He wakes up at night, crying, wishing he knew whether or not he did the right thing.

Jacque LeBue. His family was filled with thieves and assassins, but he still tried to do the right things. His family rejected him for it, and his friends all turned when they realized what he was. He never had a choice. Just like me.

Thermite. Raised in a circus, fed intestines of a monster from the negative zone, and forced into a government conspiracy before he was nine years old. He had the power to control ice, fire, and the power to annoy anybody. Even some supervillains without emotions.

We are all exiles. Wandering from place to place. Never going back to our own homes. Never finding a place where we could be accepted.

I am Nobody

I am an Exile.


	3. Legends

**Challenge: **

**Legends; **In the distant future, people tell each other ancient legends about Age of Heroes...

- Write a legend about one of the superheroes.

- It must be a real character, not OC.

**Alright, so I'm not sure whether this was supposed to be a legend about only one hero, or whether that descriptive sentence was part of the guidelines or what. All in all, I'm not sure whether I've actualy done this challenge. But I hope you enjoy this anyway. I got the inspiration for this from the _What if... _graphic novel _Old Man Logan_. Except the future isn't really dystopian, just hopeless. Nobody here remembers heroes beyond urban legends and nobody is inspired to do the right thing because of it. Actually, now that I've written this I think I may write more than just the one chapter in my spair time, but we'll see. I was going to have a dramatic reveal of who the old man is at the end, by revealing that Doom's nullifier had an expiration date and the old man actually has his powers, but it broke the flow before the New Avengers gave out their call. So, I guess you'll just have to guess who he is. **

* * *

The morning sun woke the old man, just like it did every day. He stretched, feeling the comfortable weight on his belly and listening to the songs of the morning birds. The old Bugle newspapers he was using as blankets scattered off him, the smiling of Victor Von Doom, director of S.H.I.E.L.D. plastered on the front pages.

He gathered his cloak around him and sat on the park bench a while, taking his red tinted glasses out of their case and putting them on. He ran his fingers through his grey hair, and let out a remorseful sigh, like he did every morning. He could still hear them. The Ultron drones still hovered over Central Park, the whisper of their engines barely audible over the morning jogger's gasps for breath, but still noticeable to him. He checked the covering around the baby girl he was carrying in a pouch. It was still securely fastened.

He got up and stretched, his backbones popping noisily, relieved after their uncomfortable night. Some punk ran straight into him, and he curled up into a ball on the ground, protecting the baby.

"Watch where you're going old timer." The punk sneered, barely slowing down.

The baby started to cry, and the old man rocked it, making shushing noises.

"Need a hand?"

The voice seemed friendly enough. The old man reached out, and a firm grip took his hand and pulled him up. "Are you okay man?" A young man asked. He was a native American, tall and strong.

"I'm fine." The old man answered gruffly, still rocking his baby.

"Here." The young man pressed money into the older man's hand. "Buy something for your baby to eat."

The old man raised an eyebrow at the money, and then smiled. "What's your name?" He asked.

"Stephen Redwing." The younger man replied.

"Well, thank you for the cash Steve." The old man said. "You take care of yourself." He took out his cane and began tapping his way down the path, hushing and cooing his baby.

**One Day Later…**

The old man ducked into an alley looking for shelter. He took off a bit of his hot dog and offered it to his baby. "Want some?" The little girl clapped, her blue eyes shining up at him. She ate her portion almost as greedily as the old man ate his.

The old man stopped, as he realized that this alley was occupied.

Seven large men were standing in front of Steve Redwing, each one holding a plank of wood with nails in it. Six other kids stood behind Steve, a good distance behind.

"You're overdue Redwing." The leader growled. "And the kingpin don't like that. Now, you and your little Nancy Street gang here gotta pay the Devils their due."

_So, these are the Devil's gang._ The old man thought. _They must be expanding from Hell's Kitchen._

Redwing didn't back down. "Give me some more time and I can get the Kingpin his money, and a little extra."

"Ha! No man, you've been pushing your luck way too long. You don't think word hasn't gotten around? The protection racket you guys run, it's an honest protection racket. And if the guys pay you, you'll actually protect them. This is an embarrassment to street gangs all over New York, and it's gonna hafta end."

Redwing took a step forward. "Fine. I'll accept the punishment. But the rest of my gang doesn't deserve –"

The Devil's gang burst into laughter. "You hear that guys?" He asked. "He thinks his little gang doesn't deserve their punishment! You don't get to decide what you deserve." The leader said. "You are one dead bunch of droogs."

"Oh yeah?" One of the guys behind Steve stepped up, hefting a baseball bat. "Excalibur here might have a bit to say on that subject."

The old man hesitated. This didn't concern him. He should just walk away, worry about baby… but he owed Steve a twenty. He sighed. It was a while since he'd done anything impetuous.

He walked up the two gangs. "Excuse me, Steve?" He asked. Everybody turned their heads to look at him. "Hold the baby for me."

"What?" Steve asked incredulously.

"Just hold her." The old man said, taking her out of her pouch and handing her over.

The Devil's gang began to laugh as Steve lifted the baby. "Look old man, I don't think you understand the situation here…"

The old man whipped out his cane.

He started by jumping into the air and kicking the leader in the face, dropping him to the ground like a stone, followed by his teeth. He spun his cane around sweeping the next guy off his feet and using him as a spring-board to launch himself at the next guy, hitting him in the back of the next. He delivered a final kick to his springboard and made a few adjustments to his cane. By this time the remaining Devils realized they were getting beaten by an old blind man and started to swing their clubs at him. The old man dodged expertly, and the cane in his hands transformed into a billy club. With one good throw he bounced it off the Devil's skulls, and he caught it as it came back to him. Only one was left standing. He finished him off with a kick between the legs.

He readjusted the billy club back into a cane and walked over to Steve, as he was staring dumbstruck. "Thanks." He said, taking back the baby.

"No." An African-American girl stepped up. "Thank you old timer. We were buttered toast until you came along."

"Yeah thanks." Steve said. "This is Oceana, Leo, Ben, Cho, Sofia, and Alex." He gestured to the people behind him. "We're the Nancy Street Gang."

"Good to meet you." The old man answered gruffly, and he began walking down the alley.

"Are you Daredevil?"

The old man stopped and turned around. "What?"

Oceana blushed. "My folks… they used to tell me stories about a blind man named Daredevil who protected New York."

The old man turned to leave, then stopped as thunder echoed in the sky. Rain started to fall. He hated rain. So did his baby. "Hey, you need a place to stay?!" Steve asked over the downpour. The old man hesitated, then nodded.

* * *

The old man rubbed his hands over the warmth of the fire. The Nancy Street Gang had decided that it wasn't safe in their old hide-out, so they were in the abandoned Grimm Youth Center. Ben and Alex went searching for food in the vending machines. Cho was sitting by the window, looking out for trouble. Sofia was keeping the fire going. Oceana and Leo were talking with Steve in a corner.

"Daredevil doesn't exist Oceana. Sure, this guy is blind and he does kick some serious ass, but next thing you know you'll be talking about Santa Claus or the Avengers."

The old man winced.

"Leo believes me, and so does Alex."

"yeah, well Leo's your boyfriend, he'll agree to anything. And Alex isn't… well, you know… all there."

A loud crash came from outside of the room. Moments later, Alex came back in, swinging his baseball bat, followed by Ben dragging a broken vending machine. "They said I was crazy, they said it couldn't be done! But I showed them, I showed them all. Behold! We return bearing food!" He eagerly bit into a musketeer bar.

"I still say he's Dardevil." Oceana muttered.

"Yeah, well I'm not." The old man said. Everybody turned to him. "I have good ears." He explained, digging into a bag of pretzels.

Oceana walked over to the fire. "Well if you're not Daredevil, how can you fight so good blind?"

The old man hesitated, then sighed. "Because, the real Daredevil taught me how."

"Impossible." Steve said. "Daredevil doesn't exist."

"No, but he used to." The old man said. "He and Captain America, Spider-man, the Avengers, mutants, Atlantis, the Savage Land, and all the other old stories your government doesn't want you to think are real."

"Well if they all exist, then what happened to them?" Steve asked.

"I'll tell you." The old man said. "I'll tell you about the fall of the Age of Heroes."

"Oooooh… Story-time." Alex bit into his chocolate bar excitedly.

____

**Thirty-Five years earlier;**

_Spider-man swung unsteadily through the New York skyline, flailing around at the end of his web-shooters, trying desperately to hold on to his webbing. With one last swing he swooped down towards Avenger's mansion. The stones that once shone bright with hope were now laying crumbling on the grass, the barest skeleton of its infrastructure still standing._

_Spider-man broke a rib against a window frame on his way down, and he tumbled to the floor. He rose unsteadily. "cap?" He called. "Logan? Johnny?"_

_"Over here Spider-man." A skinny old man in an ill-fitting Captain America uniform emerged from the shadows, dragging his shield behind him._

_"Oh no." Spider-man sighed. "They got you too."_

_"I don't think there's anybody left they didn't get." Cap said. "Bruce is trying to make contact with anybody else, but it doesn't look good."_

_Spider-man followed Cap into the sub-levels of Avenger mansion. "Black Cat's dead." He said. "And the Sinister Seven. They put up one hell of a fight. Except Goblin; he tried to make a deal with them. They blew his head off."_

_"Poor demented bastard." Cap grunted. He lost his grip on his shield and it fell down the stairs with a loud clang. He screamed in frustration and collapsed on the stairs. "We were fools Spider-man." Cap cried. "We took our powers for granted, and the government got scared of us, just like they got scared of mutants. And now look at us."_

_Spider-man sat down next to him and put a hand on hand on his back._

_Johnny Storm came up, carrying Cap's shield. "Hey Cap? You dropped this."_

_Cap looked into the white star with a look of hopelessness._

_"Captain." Spider-man said. "If there's one thing I've learned in my life, it's this; when the going gets hardest, that's when it's most important to keep on fighting."_

_Cap let out a grim chuckle. "What happened to 'with great power comes great responsibility?'"_

_Spider-man shrugged. "I pocketed that gem when I realized that even without my powers I still have all of my responsibilities."_

_Cap sighed then resolutely took his shield from Johnny's hands. "Come on. We have work to do."_

_They walked down to the command center together. Bruce was at the monitors talking to Union Jack and Blazing Skull. Skull's head was noticeably not blazing. Iron Fist meditated on the floor as Squirrel Girl paced around him, agitated. Johnny Blaze was trying to write cultic symbols on the wall with his blood to summon Mephistopheles. Thor stared at his hammer, after failing to pick it up for the thirteenth time. Wolverine sat in the corner, coughing up blood._

_"Hey Cap, when's that last stand happening?" He growled._

_"As soon as Bruce has everybody together, we can go."_

_Wolverine coughed viscously. "My own skeleton is killing me. I don't want to go out like this Captain. I want to go out fighting and slashing at the people who did this to us…" He was interrupted by another coughing fit._

_Captain America walked over to the monitor. "Is everybody ready Bruce?"_

_"Almost." Bruce said. "Jones is ready with his team of already non-powered heroes, and Daredevil's bringing the Marvel Knights. But the Invaders can't make it."_

_"Why not?" The Captain asked Union Jack._

_"Because the Invaders are dead." He said. "Me and Skull here are the only ones left, and we're pinned down. Can you do this without us?"_

_Cap thought silently for a moment. "It might work." He said._

_"I'm sorry we couldn't help." Union Jack said._

_"Don't worry about it." Cap frowned. "Worry about staying alive." He turned to Bruce. "What about the Fantastic Five?"_

_Bruce shook his head. "Last I heard, they were caught and killed in Central Park. I haven't managed to reach Tony yet. We can only assume…"_

_Cap sighed. "Blackbolt?"_

_"There's been a revolt among the Inhumans. He can't send any help."_

_Cap slammed his fist into the table and pulled it back hastily, wincing in pain. "I don't think we can do this." He said._

_"I do." Daredevil tapped his way into the room, followed by Moon Knight and Luke Cage supporting Deadpool between them, his face more misshapen than usual._

_Cap nodded. "Thanks for coming Daredevil, but we're outgunned."_

_"I don't think so." Daredevil said. "I'm here. And you. And Spider-man. And most of the Avengers. I'd say that anybody who wants a piece of us is outgunned."_

_"Welcome... to the gun show." Deadpool said hoarsely. "We accept Visa… Paypal… or a whole lot of buttwhoopin'."_

_"You're Captain America." Daredevil said. "We'll never lose if you're here."_

_"But I'm not Captain America!" Cap pulled his loose-fitting mask back and dropped his shield. "I'm just Steve Rogers. And I wasn't fit to join the army back when kids far younger than me could get in, what makes you think I'm fit to be an Avenger!?"_

_"Well... I'm pretty sure... you can still beat up little girls... in cute pink dresses." Deapool noted. "That's got to count for something…"_

_"Don't you ever shut up!?" Cap yelled, storming out of the room._

_"I'll shut up... when I'm dead and buried." Deadpool rasped. "Until then… I think I'll go hit on She-hulk."_

_Cap emerged into the New York twilight, and breathed in deeply, trying to relax. He hated this. He hated that he was powerless._

_"Captain?" Cap turned face to face with Kurt Wagner, now utterly normal looking and bare-foot._

_"Kurt?" Cap asked. "What are you doing here?"_

_"The X-men are here to help." Kurt said._

_"The X-men…" Cap pushed past him and looked over the rubble. A literal army sat on the Mansion's front steps, everybody who had ever been an X-man was there. Hellion was there, leading the Brotherhood and the Acolytes. There were even some mutants who he didn't recognize. They were all dressed in X-men uniform and each wielding some type of makeshift weapon, ranging from guns, to crowbars, to brooms with the head broken off._

_"This isn't your fight Kurt." Cap said. "You're all normal now, you can hide somewhere and live normal lives. You don't have to be here."_

_"With all due respect Captain, the hell we don't." Kurt replied. "Those sentinels are killing heroes, friends, and we are going to do everything in our power to stop it."_

_Cap looked back. The Avengers came out behind him. "You once said to me, that being Captain America was about more than powers." Daredevil said, handing his shield back to him. "Prove it. I dare you."_

_Cap picked up his shield and turned to address the collection of depowered mutants and heroes._

_"Hello." He said. "We all have one thing in common; we once had superpowers. We didn't ask for these powers, how could we? No morally sane man would accept the responsibility that comes with them. The world is truly fortunate that these powers, these chances to become something extraordinary, found their way into the hands of some of the bravest and greatest men and women I've had the honor of knowing."_

_"Unfortunately, others have gained powers and have used them criminally. S.H.I.E.L.D. has decided that these threats to society must be dealt with in the firmest manner possible; making superpowers illegal. They want to go back to the world before the first Human Torch showed up, the beacon that first lit the way for us. "_

_"Maybe, they're right. Maybe the world would be a better place if we let the normal people live their own lives and handle their own problems. Maybe they would be better off if they didn't look to the skies for a superman when a bank is robbed. But as far as I can see, that's not the issue. We aren't doing what we're doing to solve the world's problems. There will always be evil in this world. There will always be crime, misery, and despair."_

_"We fight, not because we think we can eradicate evil; we fight because we can make a dent. We fight because all evil needs to prosper is for good men to do nothing. Good men, who do nothing because they do not believe they can do anything. I am ashamed to say that most of us had to have our powers thrust at us for us to make that choice. But now that we have lost our powers, do we stand down?"_

_"If you want to leave, if you want to hide and live a normal life, than leave now! You'll fit right in with the billions who you'll be living with. But now that you know what it's like to be able to make a difference - even a small one - for the better, can you sit in your living rooms and live your lives with a free conscience? Can you live your days knowing that you once spat in the face of villainy daily? Can you blame it all on your powers, and say with any honesty that without your powers you are no more than anybody else?"_

_"No! Even without our powers, S.I.E.L.D. is hunting us, killing us, and do you know why? It's because they know – they know what true power is. True power isn't flying, or lifting trucks, or firing rockets from our fingers. Our true power, the power that made each of us heroes, is being able to look at the odds, and look at the chances, and to say; 'I probably won't win, but I'll do it anyway – because it's right!' "_

_"Flying will only get us halfway there, the reason we can truly call ourselves **super**heroes is because we refuse to stand down when our neighbors are victim to senseless crime. We refuse to wander upon a robbery and say, 'it's not my problem'. It is our problem! Every single man woman and child on this earth has the power to stand up when the bad guys say sit! To stand between evil and its goal, and when asked to move, plant their feet and say; 'No, you move'."_

_"My friends are being hunted down because mankind is jealous of them for being what they wish they could be, because it is so much easier to bring heroes down than to bring themselves up. And while this is happening, I will be climbing that uphill slope! I will be spitting at the odds between the eyes! Will I win? Maybe, maybe not. But I won't be at the bottom of the hill, wondering what would have happened if I tried to climb it! And that is enough for me! "_

_"So, friends, enemies, whoever you are! If you choose to come with me… if you choose to refuse to give up… then today, if only for today, you will be heroes! You will be Avengers! And as long as any one of us can still breath, the very pits of hell will quake in fear and the most hardened of criminals and the most deranged of sociopaths will flee in sheer terror, when they hear our call!"_

**AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!**

**

* * *

**

The old man finished his last pretzel. "That was one of the finest days of my life. I got hit early on in the fight, but Jubilee survived, and she described it to me. Spider-man managed to take out twenty of the sentinels before he ran out of web fluid. Then, with the help of Shadowcat, he managed to hack into another one and take out a good forty more with it before he took a bullet for Iceman. Then, with his last breath, he set the sentinel he was using on a kamikaze attack on the S.H.E.I.L.D. Helicarrier, blowing it out of the sky."

"Wolverine was pretty much already dead by the time he got there, but he still knew how to fight. He tore his claws out of his hands one by one, and threw them through each of the two tri-sentinel's heads. Then he managed to wrestle one of the sentinels to the ground in a beserker rage before five of them torched him at once. The Sentinel under him tried to get up, but Wolverine's adamantium jaw was still embedded in its C.P.U. There was not a rational human there who did not give him a wide berth."

"Doom's nullifier ray effected magical powers too, so Thor couldn't swing his hammer or summon lightning. But he was still an asgardian, and when Nimrod started to join the fight, he charged at him head on, picking up a fallen sentinel and using it as a hammer to beat nimrod into the ground. When Doom himself fired a rocket at him from the helicarrier, Thor caught it and threw it back. Unfortunately it was a seeker missile, or the day might have been won."

"Nightcrawler lead the X-men like a natural in Scott's stead. When the Punisher radioed for help, his gang of heroes who never had powers pinned down, he led the charge to save them, and then went into facility X with the Punisher, cutlasses swing, sacrificing themselves to blow up Master Mold and get rid of the Sentinel project forever."

"Captain America could barely lift his own shield. But he just kept walking. Just kept putting one foot in front of the other. He managed to steal a jet and fly up to the Helicarrier before Spider-man blew it up. Nobody knows what happened after that, but rumor has it he walked right up to Doom, shield held high, ignoring the people shooting at him, and with his final breath he said; 'I'm going to end this like it began; introducing evil to my right hook'. He then punched Dr. Doom in the jaw. They say that Doom was so impressed, he has a shrine dedicated to Captain America in his castle.

"Deadpool never did shut up. I was there when he died; he just kept asking for an Avengers badge. I gave him mine. And then he went into a rendition of 'badger badger badger badger mushroom mushroom' for another hour after he died. I think he might still be singing it, if we could've found his body in the aftermath of the explosion."

"After it was over, me and the survivors gathered up what we could find to remember the heroes by; scraps of cloth, Cap's shield, Spider-man's web shooters. The Sentinels were gone, but one by one we all died anyway. There are only six of us still alive."

"Of course, the plan to get rid of supervillains didn't work. In order to make everybody forget about heroes, htey closed down the factories and businesses manufacturing superhero products, causing more people to turn to crime. The 'plague' you all know about was really just S.H.I.E.L.D. eliminating everybody who wouldn't keep quiet about heroes, starting with J. Jonah Jameson. The anti-supercriminal act actually had a higher body count than most of the times comsic entities tried to destroy the planet. We did the best we could to help, but it just wasn't enough."

He finished his story. The Nancy Street Gang stared at him, mouths open in astonishment.

"Okay, no way that really happened." Cho shook his head. "It's too fantastic. No way could S.H.I.E.L.D. keep something that big a secret."

"Yeah." Steve agreed. "Did that really happen? It didn't, did it old man?"

"I feel like liquorice." Alex got up and searched the vending machine.

The old man leaned close. "Let me answer your question with another question." He said. "After hearing this, tall-tale or not, does it matter whether it really happened or not? Whatever you do next in your lives, however this story has effected you, does it matter whether thirty-five years ago these men and women walked the earth or whether they're just legends?"

Steve looked to his left, then to his right. His gang gave him a nod. "No, it doesn't." He said.

The old man smiled. "Good answer."

**Almost a year later…**

"No." The convenient store clerk folded his arms. "I have been robbed three times in as many months by you. I refuse to pay you any longer."

"Well that's too bad." The man covered in tattoos gestured to his goon, and overweight man wielding a chainsaw. "I guess you ain't protected from us anymore either then."

The shop clerk paled. "This never happened with the old Nancy Street Gang."

The tattooed man chuckled. "The old gang is ancient history. This is the real Nancy Street Gang."

The old man hid behind the magazine rack. He'd already called in the team. He set his daughter down. "You stay out of trouble, okay suzie?"

The little girl looked up at him with her blue eyes. "'Kay daddy."

The old man walked to the front of the store. "You don't want to be doing that." He told the robbers.

"What, are you gonna stop us old man?" The tattooed man pushed him back.

The Old man got up slowly, and took off his glasses revealing the nasty burn marks around his eyes. "If I have to. But I don't think I will. I think the Avengers will stop you."

The man with the chainsaw let out a moan and backed away from the old man a bit. The tattooed man looked at him and laughed. "The Avengers? Oooh, scary. I bet the boogey man will join them right? Don't try and frighten us with urban legends old man."

"But that's the thing about legends, isn't it?" The old man asked with a smile. "They tend to inspire people."

"Shut your pie-hole man, or I'll get blob here to shut it for you."

"I can't do that. I promised a great man and a good friend something. I promised him that as long as I can still breath, the very pits of hell will quake and the most hardened of criminals and the most deranged of sociopaths will flee in terror when they hear out call. I haven't been keeping my promise lately. But I'm going to start today."

"Yeah." The tattooed man took out a gun. "Let's fix that little breathing problem."

He pulled the trigger, but before the bang there was a small thwip. He yelled in pain as his gun backfired, the barrel covered in a sticky substance. The two criminals turned.

Steve stood in the doorway, holding Captain America's shield. Behind him, Sophia, the new Scarlet Spider, had her web shooters pointed at the two criminals. Alex stood next to her, wearing Deadpool's mask and giggling excitedly. Ben, A.K.A. Ironclad, made an imposing figure behind them, wearing one of Iron-man's bulkier suits of armor. Oceana, the new Daredevil, twirled her billy club menacingly. Leo stood next to her, three adamantium claws attached to each glove. Cho was in the back, wearing oriental clothes and clutching the eye of agamotto in his hand.

"Dude… no way." The tattooed man began to panic. "It can't be…"

"Dude… dude it's Captain America! And Wolverine! Holy #%$ we're dead!"

"Dude, say it." Deadpool said, taking Excalibur out of the golf bag on his back. "You know you've been practicing it in the mirror. Just say it."

Captain America smiled menacingly at the two criminals.

__

"AVENGERS! ASSEMBLE!"


	4. Shattered Dimensions

**Challenge:**

**Shattered Dimensions: **In the most recent Spider-Man game, our hero ends up having to ally with three parallel versions of himself in order to save the day. But suppose the Tablet of Order and Chaos had affected another Marvel Character, Hero or Villain? Write a story where a Marvel 616 Character encounters three other versions of him or herself through any sort of plot device you choose, Tablet or something else. Your characters can end up getting along splendidly or beat each other to a pulp, it's up to you. Ideally use recognisable Parallel Dimensions (House of M, Marvel Zombies, Ultimate, 2099 etc) rather than created ones, though these can be allowed.

**It was really hard to choose which Hulk to use for this challenge. For the bad Hulk the three Hulks would have to team up against, I almost went with the Hulk from _Old Man Logan_. I also considered putting in the _Yellow Hulk_, and _Bruce Banner, Spider-man_ from _Bullet Points_. But in the end, I decided just to make it a simple tribute, to that old classic Hulk that found his way into everybody's hearts played by Lou Ferrigno and Bill Bixby. Here's to them.**

"Lower the magnetic clamps doctor Billings." Dr. Davis instructed. Looking out through the glass wall separating them from the chamber outside, he felt a surge of pride. He was managing to actually contribute something to the world.

The Martin Ranch facility was a top secret installation investigating parallel earths. According to their instruments, their earth was #400,005 along the lines of synchronized continuity. The press was waiting outside, (though, not Davis' personal tail, thank god) as were several military leaders.

"Magnetic clamps set Dr. Davis." Billings said from inside the chamber. He exited, and General Ross stepped forward. Ross had bravely volunteered to be the first to make contact with a new world.

"Activating gamma matrix." Dr. Davis didn't let it show how genuinely excited he felt. In some new parallel earth, there might be a cure for his… condition.

They slowly opened up the portal. After ten minutes of excruciatingly slow suspense, it flashed to life before the General's eyes.

Everybody in the lab clapped and cheered. "Settle down." Davis said with a smile. "No need to pop open the Champaign just yet." They'd opened a portal to the infinite linear systems, now thye needed a location to touch down on.

"General Ross." Davis said with a twinkle in his eyes. "Pick a number."

"How about… 21. No, wait, 45." The General said, eyes on the portal.

"Why not both?" Dr. Billings asked.

"Setting course for earth #2,145." Dr. Davis set the gyroscope.

The image that came out of the portal was terrifying.

The barren landscape stretched before them, cars overturned, buildings crumpled.

"I think we made a bad choice." Dr. Davis said, chills running down his spine.

"Yeah I think you're right." Dr. Billings stared, mesmerized.

"Something's coming." Dr. Ross said. He pointed. There was a figure on the horizon, moving closer.

"We should close the gate." Davis said.

"No." General Ross shook his head. "If there's anybody alive in this wasteland, we should rescue it."

The figure got closer, and bigger. "I'm closing it." Dr. Davis moved to the control panel, but Dr. Billings pushed him away.

"Are you mad man? We're on the verge of a scientific breakthrough! The first alternate earth traveler! Think of it!"

"I'm telling you, this isn't right!" Davis said. "We should turn this thing off!"

"Helloooo!" General Ross yelled through the portal. "Can you hear me?"

The figure on the horizon began running towards them at astonishing speed. Dr. Davis stared in shock as he took in the creature coming towards him. It was huge. It was green. It was… the Hulk.

"Turn that blasted thing off!" Davis yelled, but it was too late. The green monster stepped through the portal and picked up General Ross. His daughter screamed in terror as the monstrosity spoke.

"HULK. EAT. BRAINS." The rotting Hulk bit off the General's head.

"Security, get down here!" Billings yelled into a radio. It wouldn't do any good. Davis knew. The monster Hulk laughed, and kicked the door open. Davis couldn't do anything except wonder at its strength. Davis couldn't fight that thing. He thought, furiously.

"HULK! EAT! BRAINS!" He snatched up another scientist and bit into his shoulder.

That was it. Davis would lead the Hulk back through the portal. He tried to re-open it quickly. "What was the earth number again… 90,210? …295?"

The Hulk roared and pushed Davis into the wall, his hand simply brushing against the dial. "HULK! EAT!" The smell of rot came with his breath, and Davis' eyes went wide.

"Hey!"

The two turned to the portal. According to the indicator, the dial had reached earth #9997. A small blind boy on top of what looked like a giant green gorilla walked through the portal. "Bad Hulk!" The boy yelled. "Stop right there!"

The Monster Hulk charged at them, and the boy dove out of the way, as the monster and the gorilla battled, smashing through walls.

"Are you all right mister…" The boy reached out his hand, blindly.

"Dr." Davis said. "Dr. Davis. What was that?"

"Oh that?" The boy shrugged. "He's just the Hulk but it looks like you've got a Hulk of your own. Been playing with inter-dimensional travel have you?"

"Yes." Davis ran his hands through his hair. "And I powered the portal through Gamma radiation, probably inclining the portal to search out the largest source of gamma radiation on the planet."

"One heck of a design flaw." The boy held out his hand. "My name's Bruce Banner."

Davis shook his hand. Then he came to his senses. "Can your Hulk hold out for long?" He asked.

"No." Bruce said. "We need help. If your portal thing finds Hulks on other dimensions, I'd recommend earth #1,610, and #616."

"Alright." Dr. Davis set the controls on the machine and opened the portal to earth #1610.

A giant grey Hulk turned around. "Who're you?" He grunted.

"This is Dr. Davis & I'm Bruce Banner from an alternate earth. We need your help fighting some sort of… zombie Hulk."

"Pfff." The Hulk snorted decisively. "Yeah, I got this." The Hulk got up and walked into the room, following the trail of destruction out.

The next time the portal opened up to Bruce Banner sitting by the lake.

He looked up. "Oh. Well hello there."

"Excuse me," Little Bruce asked. "But are you the Hulk?"

"Why do you ask?"

"Well, apparently this interdimensional portal focuses on the largest amount of Gamma Radiation. And it kind of unleashed a Hulk Zombie, and we could really use the Hulk's help here."

Bruce thought a moment, and then put away his fishing rod. He calmly walked through the portal and up to Dr. Davis. "Why aren't you helping?"

"Who are you talking to?" Little Bruce asked.

"Well surely you've seen… oh, I'm sorry." Bruce realized the smaller Bruce was blind. "It's just… this man looks just like me."

Little Bruce turned to Dr. Davis. "He said his name was Dr. Davis."

Davis shook his head. "I lied. My name is David Bruce Banner."

Bruce frowned. "Why haven't you hulked out yet? To help against this rogue Hulk?"

"I don't turn into it unless I have to." David explained. "The rage… the monster…"

"Are there any other heroes on this earth?" Bruce asked.

"What?"

"Heroes. Thor… Captain America… Iron-man…"

"Well, I don't know about those last two. But Thor is on this earth. And a guy named Daredevil, who maybe you've heard of."

"Yes, we've met. But does this earth have the Avengers? Defenders? Any team of heroes?"

"Well no… but what does this have to do with…"

Bruce put a hand on David's shoulder. "David. You can't live your life afraid of the monster inside of you, constantly looking for a cure. I've been to a couple of alternate dimensions and all across my own universe, and I can tell you now, you will never find a cure. The best you can do, is use the Hulk's power to do good." He gestures to the hole in the wall, leading out to where the other three Hulks were fighting. "It's what most of us do. You don't have to be alone David."

David Banner's eyes started watering up. The two Hulks yelled, and were pushed back into the room with the three Banners. "The sucker's strong!" the Ultimate Hulk yelled. "He must have some form of cosmic power or something!"

Bruce started forward, but he was stopped by David. "You've made me angry." He gasped, before his eyes flashed green. His skin stretched, tearing up his clothes. He grew over six feet tall with matching muscles. He bellowed in pain, and began moving forward. He picked up computer console, sparks flashing as he tore it from the wall, and he threw it at the Hulk zombie.

The Hulk zombie turned around, lunging at the Hulk. He tore a pipe from the wall and plunged it into his mouth, through the brain. It was short work to beat him after that.

* * *

David Bruce Banner reflected on the strange Hulks from other worlds. He thought of their heroism and their acceptance of their fate.

He pulled his coat up around his face. He looked to his left. Donald Blake nodded. He looked to his right. Matthew Murdock smiled. The three of them left the alley, following another man in a trenchcoat down the rainy streets.

"Mister McGee." Daivid called. McGee froze. "If you're willing to put aside our differences, and your tranquilizer gun, I'd like to give you an interview."

And so, the Avengers of earth #400,005 began.


	5. The New Exiles

**Okay, so, this one-shot wasn't a challenge. Remember chapter two? Well, I thought it was just a little too dark. Also, the characters were all taken from different universes save for the main character. So, for this team of Exiles the entire cast are from dimensions not yet known. Each and every one of them are my own creations. And... I think if I weren't so busy, this could take a hint from my Legends story and become it's own fanfic. (By the way, for those of you who don't know, Chapter three, Legends, is now a ten-chapter story in it's own right. If you liked it, go to my profile and read it. It's really good.)**

**So, yeah. Eric O'Grady, my personal favorite Ant-man, I decided to reimagine as a thief. Because he doesn't really have that good of a reputation on earth 616 does he? If this story were to continue, he'd be the leader of the Exiles and, basically, the team Batman. **

**Peter Parker as Nova... my thought process on this was as follows; Peter Parker is the single greatest hero ever. However, he is limited to patrolling the streets. He's a street hero, simple as that. What if he weren't? What if he had some real power. Boom. Peter Parker; Nova, taking on galactic giants as only he can.**

**At first, Pete Wisdom was going to be a normal guy, not a superhero or a government agent or anything, who just happened to be a mutant with a power that... was less than comvenient. Okay, that's an understatement. His power was going to be turning his skin into glass shards. While his skin's like that, he can't talk or see without cutting his tongue or eyes. Useful in a close fight, but not anywhere else. So, yeah. Would've been interesting, but I decided I needed somebody on the team that had magical powers. Thus, I gave him the Staff of One.**

**Rachel McKenzie, the Mariner, is Namor. Yes, McKenzie is Namor's last name. In this universe, Namor's father didn't have a kid with a fish girl, he instead had a normal family. So Rachel is completely mutant, not part-mutant part-atlantean, and her genetic structure has been altered as such (resulting in her being a she instead of a Namor). But she still has water powers. And also, a bowie knife. **

**The Black Archer is an alternate version of the same named character from Squadron Supreme. Not much to tell there, except he has vision that could rival Superman's.**

**And finally, the Mask. The offspring of Tony Stark, and Madame Masque. I intend for her to be an enigma, so I will say no more on the matter. **

**I hope you enjoy this!**

* * *

Eric O'Grady whistled as he strolled into the Kingpin's offices in Fisk tower. "Wilson, baby." He said, smiling his signature smile and strutting his stuff. "What did I tell you, huh? What did I tell you? If you want something stolen, you come straight to me and I'll deliver."

"Of course O'Grady." The Kingpin said, not smiling back.

"What'd I tell you?" Eric said, placing the vial on the Kingpin's desk. "The name's Impossible Man." He tapped the letter I on his jacket. "For when you need to steal something impossible."

"Yes yes, we're all very impressed." The Kingpin said sourly. "Is this it?"

"Yep." Eric grinned. "Pym particles, stolen straight out of a S.H.E.I.L.D. carrier. If I were you, I'd think about using them to lose some weight."

"Good idea." Dum-Dum Dugan, director of S.H.I.E.L.D., stepped out from behind the Kingpin. One gun trained on him, the other at O'Grady. Eric began to back away towards the door.

"I'm sorry O'Grady." Fisk said.

"If it's any consolation, your record is intact." Dugan said. "You managed to steal the particles and give us the slip real good. Too bad for you, we knew who your employer was."

"Well, at least you'll have the satisfaction of knowing that you almost caught me." O'Grady dove for the door. Only to be rebutted by a man in powered armor. His face went pale. "Ooooh… and you have back-up."

"Nobody steals from us and gets away with it." President Tony Stark advanced, followed by President Hank and Janet Pym, President Rogers, President Banner, the Mighty President Thor, and Vice-President Jones.

"Well… it looks like you're certainly very angry at a certain somebody hiring my services." O'Grady said, pointing at Fisk as he backed away. "I'll… just be leaving." He ran for the window and leaped out, tugging a chord in his jacket.

"Get him!" President Stark yelled as his parachute opened behind him and he floated down. Dum-Dum started firing at him, but O'Grady had anticipated this; the parachute wasn't to slow his falling. It was a Kevlar lined parachute, meant to stop him from getting shot on his way down and to make sure they didn't see what he was doing. He quickly took out his zipline and attached a small explosive to its handle, set to two seconds.

The firing stopped, and he dropped the zipline just as President Rogers leapt down onto his chute. He shrugged himself out of his jacket, letting it fall with the president. The explosion triggered and pressed against the handle of the zipline below. Two chords shot out of it, each attaching to a building on the other side of the street. He grabbed the handle and slid down the chord, smashing through an apartment building window.

He saw President Stark follow, and tore the curtains off their hooks. He tossed them behind him as he ran, covering up President Stark. While he was fumbling around trying to get clear, O'Grady ran for the door, but an enormous hand broke through the walls. It grabbed him, and pulled him out.

"Do you still feel like the big man O'Grady?" President Pym asked.

"Not… so much." O'Grady grunted, trying to squirm his way out.

"Why did you do it?" Pym asked. "You must have known we wouldn't stop until we found you after you stole from my lab. So why?"

O'Grady smiled. "To see… if I could. And… I'd do it… again."

President Thor descended on him. "Eric O'Grady, A.K.A. the Impossible Man. We, the presidents of the United States of America, hereby find you guilty of treason, punishable by death. Do you have any last words?"

"I… voted… for the liberals!" O'Grady yelled.

"Pull!" Thor yelled, and President Pym tossed the Impossible Man into the air. Lightning struck.

* * *

Thanos tossed Nova aside like a ragdoll. "I must say I'm impressed." He said. "When we first met, all those many years ago, you were but a boy. And yet you challenged me. And here you stand, continuing to challenge me through the years. You must know of the futility of it; yet you persist on princicple."

Nova ran at him. Thanos caught the punch, and knocked him aside again. "You have indeed been a worthy adversary. I cannot imagine that pathetic alien Rhomann being capable of choosing a better. But now, alas, it is time for us to part ways forever." He placed his foot carefully over Nova's head. "Goodbye, insect."

Suddenly, the two of them were surrounded by light. "What is this?" Thanos asked.

Nova coughed up blood. "Oh… well you see, while you were duking it out with Nihil after I arranged for the two of you to go to war, I managed to sneak into the controls for your teleportation device. For the past couple of minutes while we've been fighting, I managed to synchronize it with my suit. That last punch I gave you… while it distracted you I slipped a transdisc into your belt, so you could teleport with me. One of my own inventions. We're being teleported over twenty trillion bisecs away right now." The lights faded and space surrounded them again, save for the bright light of the sun. "To the sun of the Oberon system. Which is currently going supernova!"

Nova swung his fists around, battering Thanos. "How does it feel! How does it feel to be beaten by an 'insect'? I bet your girlfriend's thinking a whole lot about you right now! About how she wouldn't be caught dead with you! But don't take my word for it… go ask her yourself!" Nova threw him into the supernova.

Nova paused and caught his breath, then realized he was being pulled towards it too. "No…"

_The gravity pull of the supernova is too dense to overcome._ The worldmind said. _The teleporter has short-circuited. We are going to die. _

"Well thanks. Being the genius that I am, I hadn't already calculate that." Nova said, annoyed. We knew going into this it'd be a one-way trip, and I assumed I'd still be strong enough to escape the event horizon.

_I thought, being a genius, you would have figured a way out by now?_

Nova sighed. "No. Not this time." Nova thought quietly as he plummeted into the dying star. "You know… I think I've just had an epiphany."

_About how to escape?_

"No." Nova shook his head. "You know what I always say?"

_With great power, comes great responsibility?_

"Yeah. My Uncle Ben told me that. I think… I think what he meant to tell me was, the greatest power… is the power to face your responsibilities." The two were silent for a moment, as they watched Thanos burst into flame below them. "You know Worldmind… as talking suits go, you're the best."

_I am not a talking suit. Although, yes, that symbiote was quite a handful, wasn't he?_ The Worldmind went silent. _I am… not sure about human emotion, but… you are an honorable man, Peter Parker. And I cannot think of anybody better, to be the last bearer of the Nova Force._

"That means a lot to me." Nova said, before falling into the star.

* * *

Dr. Doom stood in front of a wall of monitors. "Bring him in." He said.

The door opened, and a pair of doombots came in, dragging Pete Wisdom between them on a chair. The dumped him on the floor and left.

Doom turned. "Peter Wisdom of the magical task force Excalibur. Make your play."

Peter stayed silent.

"Oh come come, I know you have the Staff of One. You're waiting until the opputune moment to bite your cheek. Go ahead. I'll even give you a free shot."

Peter glared at him.

"No? Well then…" Doom's foot lashed out.

"When blood is drawn, the staff of one will emerge." Peter Wisdom said in a trance as the staff came out of his chest. Dr. Doom grabbed it as it came out.

"Thank you Mr. Wisdom. You know, you're really quite predictable. Coming in at the last moment to save the day. It was child's play to bring you here. You, and the staff."

"Excalibur will stop whatever you're doing." Pete said, spitting out blood.

"Well, at least they'll be a member short." Doom held up the staff. _"Diem Noctes Fratunas!"_

* * *

Rachel McKenzie sat fishing by the lake near Xavier mansion. She enjoyed the cool summer breeze and the peaceful serenity of the lake.

"Ahem."

She opened her eyes and sat up. A swarm of sentinels floated over the lake, led by Sebastion Shaw. "Good day miss Mariner." He said jovially. "I was just on my way to eradicate mutant kind. Since you're the first mutant, I was wondering if you'd like to be the first to die."

Rachel reached into her purse and pressed the silent alert button. The X-men would be here within minutes and the rest of the school would go into the bunkers. "Listen." She said, glaring at Shaw. "My father was a fisherman. He'd take me along with him in the trawler and I'd help him clean the fish." She stood up, taking out a bowie knife. "I'm telling you this, because when I tell you that if you or your little toys move one inch forward I'll gut you like a fish, I want you to know that it isn't. Hyperbole."

Shaw grinned. And motioned to a sentinel. "MK IV, full firepower if you please." The Sentinel's armor opened up, revealing a massive array of guns.

* * *

Professor X adjusted his instruments. "How's he doing?" Kane asked.

"Not well." The Professor said. "I told you I had reservations. This… Wyatt McDonald… he was washed up before he got here. Former navy seal, dishonorable discharge, and you found him driving a taxi, begging to get back in the life."

"But how's he doing?" Kane asked, persistently.

The professor sighed. "Well if he had another mutant power we could probably work with him, but adjustable vision? And he insists on using a bow instead of a gun. Any gun. We went ahead with project Black Archer like you wanted, but really, he's a lost cause."

"What happened?"

"He failed to assassinate the target. We thought it was just a fluke, but he failed again. I've had a psychic in. It turns out, he wants to join the Squadron Supreme. He wants to leave us."

Kane tutted. "That won't do. He knows too much about weapon X. Can he be brainwashed?"

"That's not viable. Today's technology can reverse it. Too much risk."

Kane nodded. "Then the answer is clear. Terminate the project."

* * *

The Mask wandered through the crystal hallways. "Hello!" She called. "Any transdimensional beings here?" She moved into a large hallway.

"Who's that?" Nova turned around the corner. "Who are you?"

"They call me, the Mask." The Maks took off her broad hat and did a sweeping bow. "And who are you?"

"I'm Nova." They shook hands. "Do you know where this is? I was… falling into a supernova."

"And I was executed by a god of lightning." The Impossible man walked down the corridor to meet them. "Hi, I'm the Impossible man."

"Fascinating." The Mask said, looking at the two. "My own universe has a Nova and an Impossible man too, but neither of you are them. It appears that my theory about multiple realities are correct. And you both maintain that you are… dead?"

"And so am I." Rachel said, descending a staircase. "So… is this heaven?"

"If it is, I've made the greatest theological breakthrough since jesus was crucified." The Mask bowed again. "I am the Mask. I came here via a device that I thought would take me through dimensions."

"That's dangerous." Pete Wisdom said. "You shouldn't mess with things beyond your comprehension."

"You'd be surprised at what I can comprehend." The Mask said. "Am I to understand that you are in charge here?"

"If he is, than he's getting us out of here." The Black Archer pointed his bow at him. "Or he gets an arrow through his skull."

"That won't be necessary." A tall grey figure walked into the room. "My name is the Timebroker. And, I suppose I am in charge."

"Then get us out of here!" The Black Archer yelled, his bow shaking as it pointed at the Timebroker.

"Allow me to make the introductions." The Timebroker pointed to each of them in turn. "Wyatt McDonald, former navy seal, former taxi driver, and currently serving as the Black Archer. Eric O'Grady, the Impossible Man, thief of the highest caliber. Peter Parker, Nova, the sole member of the Nova Corpse in his dimension, possessor of the Nova Force and the Worldmind. Peter Wisdom, agent of Excalibur, the United Kingdom's magical task force. Rachel McKenzie, the Mariner, her world's first mutant. And, lastly, Glorianna Stark, the Mask."

He walked into the center of the chamber. "You are all currently in the M'Kraan crystal, the nexus of all reality. Through this palace, you can access every possible multiple universe. And you must. I have taken you five from your respective universes moments before your death… and Glorianna as well. You will be sent through the Multiverse, fixing divulgences in realities. You will be Exiles."


End file.
